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- CRIME AND PUNISHMENT 35
man ought not to be indebted to his wife, but that it is bettef
for a wife to look upon her husband as her benefactor. I must
add that he expressed it more nicely and politely than I have
done, for I have forgotten his actual phrases and only remember
the meaning. And, besides, it was obviously not said of design,
but slipped out in the heat of conversation, so that he tried
afterwards to correct himself and smooth it over, but all the
same it did strike me as somewhat rude, and I said so afterwards
to Dounia. But Dounia was vexed, and answered that 'words
are not deeds,' and that, of course, is perfectly true. Dounia did
not sleep all night before she made up her mind, and, thinking
that I was asleep, she got out of bed and was walking up and
down the room all night; at last she knelt down before the ikon
and pj-ayed long and fervently and in the morning she told me
that she had decided.
"I have mentioned already that Pyotr Petrovitch is just setting
ofif for Petersburg, where he has a great deal of business, and he
wants to open a legal bureau. He has been occupied for many
years in conducting civil and commercial litigation, and only
the other day he won an important case. He has to be in Peters-
burg because he has an important case before the Senate. So,
Rodya dear, he may be of the greatest use to you, in every way
indeed, and Dounia and I have agreed that from this very day
you could definitely enter upon your career and might consider
that your future is marked out and assured for you. Oh, if only
this comes to pass! This would be such a benefit that we could
only look upon it as a providential blessing. Dounia is dreaming
of nothing else. We have even .ventured already to drop a few
words on the subject to Pyotr Petrovitch. He was cautious in
his answer, and said that, of course, as he could not get on
without a secretary, it would be better to be paying a salary to a
relation than to a stranger, if only the former were fitted for the
duties (as though there could be doubt of your being fitted!)
but then he expressed doubts whether your studies at the uni-
versity would leave you time for work at his office. The matter
dropped for the time, but Dounia is thinking of nothing else
now. She has been in a sort of fever for the last few days, and
has already made a regular plan for your becoming in the end an
associate and even a partner in Pyotr Petrovitch's legal business,
which might well be, seeing that you are a stulent of law. I am
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