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- CRIME AND PUNISHMENT 119
say so. But I swear I judge her intellectually, simply from the
metaphysical point of view; there is a sort of symbolism sprung
up between us, a sort of algebra or what not! I don't under-
stand it! Well, that's all nonsense. Only, seeing that you art.
not a student now and have lost your lessons and your clothes,
and that through the young lady's death she has no need to
treat you as a relation, she suddenly took fright; and as you
hid in your den and dropped all your old relations with her, she
planned to get rid of you. And she's been cherishing that design
a long time, but was sorry to lose the i.o.u., for you assured
her yourself that your mother would pay."
"It was base of me to say that. . . . My mother herself is
almost a beggar . . . and I told a lie to keep my lodging . . .
and be fed," Raskolnikov said loudly and distinctly.
"Yes, you did very sensibly. But the worst of it is that at
that point Mr. Tchebarov turns up, a business man. Pashenka
would never have thought of doing anything on her own ac-
count, she is too retiring; but the business man is by no means
retiring, and first thing he puts the question, 'Is there any hope
of realising the i.o.u.?' Answer: there is, because he has a
mother who would save her Rodya with her hundred and twen-
ty-five roubles pension, if she has to starve herself; and a sister,
too, who would go into bondage for his sake. That's what he
was building upon. . . . Why do you start? I know all the ins
and outs of your affairs now, my dear boy — it's not for nothing
that you were so open with Pashenka when you were her
prospective son-in-law, and I say all this as a friend. . . . But
I tell you what it is; an honest and sensitive man is open; and
a business man 'listens and goes on eating' you up. Well, then
she gave the i.o.u. by way of payment to this Tchebarov, and
without hesitation he made a formal demand for payment.
When I heard of all this I wanted to blow him up, too, to clear
my conscience, but by that time harmony reigned between me
and Pashenka, and I insisted on stopping the whole affair
engaging that you would pay. I went security for you, brother.
Do you understand? We called Tchebarov, flung him ten rou-
bles and got the i.o.u. back from him, and here I have the hon-
our of presenting it to you. She trusts your word now. Here,
take it, you see I have torn it."
Razumihin put the note on the table. Raskolnikov looked at
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