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- CRIME AND PUNISHMENT 199
"But have you made her some promise? Something signed?
A promise of marriage, perhaps?"
"Nothing, nothing, absolutely nothing of the kind! Besides
she is not that sort at all. . . . Tchebarov tried that. ..."
"Well, then, drop her!"
"But I can't drop her like that!"
"Why can't you?"
"Well, I can't, that's all about it! There's an element of at-
traction here, brother."
"Then why have you fascinated her?"
"I haven't fascinated her; perhaps, I was fascinated myself
in my folly. But she won't care a straw whether it's you or I,
so long as somebody sits beside her, sighing. ... I can't explain
the position, brother . . . look here, you are good at mathematics,
and working at it now . . . begin teaching her the integral cal-
culus; upon my soul, I'm not joking. I'm in earnest, it'll be
just the same to her. She will gaze at you and sigh for a whole
year together. I talked to her once for two days at a time about
the Prussian House of Lords (for one must talk of something)
—she just sighed and perspired! And you mustn't talk of love
— she's bashful to hysterics — but just let her see you can't tear
yourself away — that's enough. It's fearfully comfortable;
you're quite at home, you can read, sit, lie about, write. You
may even venture on a kiss, if you're careful."
"But what do I want with her?"
"Ach, I can't make you understand! You see, you are made
for each other! I have often been reminded of you! . . . You'll
come to it in the end! So does it matter whether it's sooner or
later? There's the featherbed element here, brother, — ach! and
not only that! There's an attraction here — here you have the
end of the world, an anchorage, a quiet haven, the navel of the
earth, the three fishes that are the foundation of the world,
the essence of pancakes, of savoury fish-pies, of the evening
samovar, of soft sighs and warm shawls, and hot stoves to sleep
on — as snug as though you were dead, and yet you're alive — ■
the advantages of both at once! Well, hang it, brother, what
stuff I'm talking, it's bedtime! Listen. I sometimes wake up
at night; so I'll go in and look at him. But there's no need, it's
all right. Don't you worry yourself, yet if you Hke, you might
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