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- CRIME AND PUNISHMENT 427
asking myself what I was about. After all, I said, you can take
it all in another sense if you like, and it's more natural so, indeed.
I couldn't help admitting it was more natural. I was bothered!
'No, I'd better get hold of some little fact' I said. So when I
heard of the bell-ringing, I held my breath and was all in a
tremor. 'Here is my little fact,' thought I, and I didn't think it
over, I simply wouldn't. I would have given a thousand roubles
at that minute to have seen you with my own eyes, when you
walked a hundred paces beside that workman, after he had
called you murderer to your face, and you did not dare to ask
him a question all the way. And then what about your trem-
bling, what about your bell-ringing in your illness, in semi-
delirium?
"And so, Rodion Romanovitch, can you wonder that I
played such pranks on you? And what made you come at that
very minute? Some one seemed to have sent you, by Jove! And
if Nikolay had not parted us . . . and do you remember Nikolay
at the time? Do you remember him clearly? It was a thunder-
bolt, aregular thunderbolt! And how I met him! I didn't believe
in the thunderbolt, not for a minute. You could see it for your-
self; and how could I? Even afterwards, when you had gone
and he began making very, very plausible answers on certain
points, so that I was surprised at him myself, even then I didn't
believe his story! You see what it is to be as firm as a rock! No,
thought I, morgenfriih. What has Nikolay got to do with it!"
"Razumihin told me just now that you think Nikolay guilty
and had yourself assured him of it. . . ."
His voice failed him, and he broke oflf. He had been listening
in indescribable agitation, as this man who had seen through and
through him, went back upon himself. He was afraid of believ-
ing itand did not believe it. In those still ambiguous words he
kept eagerly looking for something more definite and conclusive.
"Mr. Razumihin!" cried Porfiry Petrovitch, seeming glad of
a question from Raskolnikov, who had till then, been silent.
"He-he-he! But I had to put Mr. Razumihin off; two is com-
pany, three is none. Mr. Razumihin is not the right man, besides
he is an outsider. He came running to me with a pale face. . . .
But never mind him, why bring him in! To return to Nikolay,
would you like to know what sort of a type he is, how I under-
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