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- CRIME AND PUNISHMENT 235
"Yes, yes. . . . That is, pooh, no! . . . But all that I said (and
there was something else too) it was all nonsense, drunken non-
sense."
"But why are you apologising? I am so sick of it all!" Ras-
kolnikov cried with exaggerated irritability. It was partly as-
sumed, however.
"I know, I know, I understand. Believe me, I understand.
One's ashamed to speak of it."
"If you are ashamed, then don't speak of it."
Both were silent. Razumihin was more than ecstatic and-
Raskolnikov perceived it with repulsion. He was alarmed, too,
,by what Razumihin had just said about Porfiry.
"I shall have to pull a long face with him too," he thought,
with a beating heart, and he turned white, "and do it naturally,
too. But the most natural thing would be to do nothing at all.
Carefully do nothing at all! No, carefully would not be natural
again. . . . Oh, well, we shall see how it turns out. . . . We shall
see . . . directly. Is it a good thing to go or not? The butterfly
flies to the light. My heart is beating, that's what's bad!"
"In this grey house," said Razumihin.
"The most important thing, does Porfiry know that I was
at the old hag's flat yesterday . . . and asked about the blood?
I must find that out instantly, as soon as I go in, find out from
his face; otherwise . . . I'll find out, if it's my ruin."
"I say, brother," he said suddenly, addressing Razumihin,
with a sly smile, "I have been noticing all day that you seem
to be curiously excited. Isn't it so?"
"Excited? Not a bit of it," said Razumihin, stung to the
quick.
"Yes, brother, I assiire you it's noticeable. Why, you sat on
your chair in a way you never do sit, on the edge somehow, and
you seemed to be writhing all the time. You kept jumping up
for nothing. One moment you were angry, and the next your
face looked like a sweetmeat. You even blushed; especially when
you were invited to dinner, you blushed awfully."
"Nothing of the sort, nonsense! What do you mean?"
"But why are you wriggling out of it, like a schoolboy? By
Jove, there he's blushing again."
"What a pig you are!"
"But why are you so shamefaced about it? Romeo! Stay, I'll
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