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- 200 CRIME AND PUNISHMENT
just look in once, too. But if you notice anything, delirium or
fever — wake me at once. But there can't be. . . ."
CHAPTER II
Razumihin waked up next morning at eight o'clock, troubled
and serious. He found himself confronted with many new and
unlooked-for perplexities. He had never expected that he would
ever wake up feeling like that. He remembered every detail of
the previous day and he knew that a perfectly novel experience
had befallen him, that he had received an impression unlike
anything he had known before. At the same time he recognised
clearly that the dream which had fired his imagination was
hopelessly unattainable — so unattainable that he felt positively
ashamed of it, and he hastened to pass to the other more prac-
tical cares and difficulties bequeathed him by that "thrice
accursed yesterday."
The most awful recollection of the previous day was the way
he had shown himself "base and mean," not only because he
had been drunk, but because he had taken advantage of the
young girl's position to abuse her fiance in his stupid jealousy,
knowing nothing of their mutual relations and obligations and
next to nothing of the man himself. And what right had he
to criticise him in that hasty and unguarded manner? Who had
asked for his opinion! Was it thinkable that such a creature as
Avdotya Romanovna would be marrying an unworthy man for
money? So there must be something in him. The lodgings? But
after all how could he know the character of the lodgings? He
was furnishing a flat . . . Foo, how despicable it all was! And
what justification was it that he was drunk? Such a stupid ex-
cuse was even more degrading! In wine is truth, and the truth
had all come out, "that is, all the imcleanness of his coarse and
envious heart!" And would such a dream ever be permissible to
him, Razumihin? What was he beside such a girl — he, the
drunken noisy braggart of last night? "Was it possible to im-
agine so absurd and cynical a juxtaposition?" Razumihin
blushed desperately at the very idea and suddenly the recollec-
tion forced itself vividly upon him of how he had said last night
on the stairs that the landlady would be jealous of Avdotya
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