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- 310 CRIME AND PUNISHMENT
I shall be there if I am not in a worse place," he muttered tohimself.
Sonia heard Raskolnikov's request distrustfully and moved
hesitatingly to the table. She took the book however.
"Haven't you read it?" she asked, looking up at him acrossthe table.
Her voice became sterner and sterner.
"Long ago. . . . When I was at school. Read!"
"And haven't you heard it in church?"
"I . . . haven't been. Do you often go?"
"N-no," whispered Sonia.
Raskolnikov smiled.
"I understand. . . . And you won't go to your father's funeral
to-morrow?"
"Yes, I shall. I was at church last week, too. ... I had a
requiem service."
"For whom?"
"For Lizaveta. She was killed with an axe."
His nerves were more and more strained. His head began to
go round.
"Were you friends with Lizaveta?"
"Yes. . . . She was good . . . she used to come . . . not often
. . . she couldn't. . . . We used to read together and . . . talk.
She will sec God."
The last phrase sounded strange in his ears. And here was
something new again: the mysterious meetings with Lizaveta
and both of them — religious maniacs.
"I shall be a religious maniac myself soon! It's infectious!"
"Read!" he cried irritably and insistently.
Sonia still hesitated. Her heart was throbbing. She hardly
dared to read to him. He looked almost with exasperation at
the "unhappy lunatic."
"What for? You don't believe? . . ." she whispered softly and
as it were breathlessly.
"Read! I want you to," he persisted. "You used to read to
Lizaveta,"
Sonia opened the book and found the place. Her hands were
shaking, her voice failed her. Twice she tried to begin and
could not bring out the first syllable.
"Now a certain man was sick named Lazarus of Bethany.
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