augustine

Relationships

• seeks_guidance_fromSimplicianus

  description

  The narrator felt compelled to seek guidance from Simplicianus regarding the fittest way to live in God's paths amidst his spiritual anxieties.

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• was_enthralled_withlove of woman

  description

  The narrator admits that despite his spiritual aspirations, he was still captivated by the love of woman, which caused him inner conflict.

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  But still I was enthralled with the love of woman

• foundGod

  description

  Through the common witness of all creatures, the narrator had found God to be the Creator.

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  had found Thee our Creator

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• is delighted byFaustus

  description

  The narrator expresses delight in Faustus's manner and choice of words during disputes.

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  That greediness then, wherewith I had of so long time expected that man, was delighted verily with his action and feeling when disputing, and his choice and readiness of words to clothe his ideas.

• praisesFaustus

  description

  The narrator, along with many others, praises and extols Faustus.

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  I was then delighted, and, with many others and more than they, did I praise and extol him.

• findsFaustus

  description

  The narrator discovers Faustus's lack of knowledge in liberal sciences, except for grammar.

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  I found him first utterly ignorant of liberal sciences, save grammar, and that but in an ordinary way.

• comparesManichaean Books

  description

  The narrator desired to compare the accounts in Manichaean books with other astronomical or philosophical calculations.

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  whether, on comparison of these things with the calculations I had elsewhere read, the account given in the books of Manichaeus were preferable, or at least as good.

• engages withFaustus

  description

  After his disappointment with Manichaeism, the narrator began to study literature with Faustus.

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  I began to engage with him in the study of that literature

• teaches atCarthage

  description

  The narrator states he was teaching young students at Carthage as a rhetoric-reader.

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  as rhetoric-reader I was at that time teaching young students at Carthage

• is persuaded to go toRome

  description

  The narrator recounts being persuaded to move from Carthage to Rome to teach.

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  Thou didst deal with me by wondrous ways. Thou didst it, O my God: for the steps of a man are ordered by the Lord, and He shall dispose his way. Or how shall we obtain salvation, but from Thy hand, re-making what it made? Thou didst deal with me, that I should be persuaded to go to Rome, and to teach there rather, what I was teaching at Carthage.

• deceivesNarrator's Mother

  description

  The narrator lied to his mother to escape her attempts to prevent or accompany him on his journey to Rome.

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  But I deceived her, holding me by force, that either she might keep me back or go with me, and I feigned that I had a friend whom I could not leave, till he had a fair wind to sail. And I lied to my mother

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• taughtRhetoric

  description

  The Narrator taught the discipline of rhetoric, driven by cupidity, during these years of his life.

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  In those years I taught rhetoric, and, overcome by cupidity, made sale of a loquacity to overcome by

• had_relationship_withNarrator's Companion

  description

  The Narrator maintained a faithful, though unlawful, relationship with his companion, which he describes as a 'wayward passion'.

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  In those years I had one,--not in that which is called lawful marriage, but whom I had found out in a wayward passion, void of understanding; yet but one, remaining faithful even to her

• considered_enteringTheatrical Prize

  description

  The Narrator had decided to compete for a theatrical prize, which led to an encounter with a wizard.

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  when I had settled to enter the lists for a theatrical prize

• consultedMathematicians (Impostors)

  description

  The Narrator consulted individuals styled as 'Mathematicians' for divinations, doing so without scruple as they seemed to avoid sacrifices.

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  Those impostors then, whom they style Mathematicians, I consulted without scruple

• was_friend_ofNarrator's Youthful Friend

  description

  The Narrator made a very dear friend in his native town, of his own age and with whom he shared pursuits.

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  I had made one my friend, but too dear to me

• influenced_intoSuperstitious Fables

  description

  The Narrator had led his youthful friend away from true faith and into superstitious and pernicious fables, causing distress to his mother.

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  I had warped him also to those superstitious and pernicious fables

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• struggles withWill

  description

  The narrator describes an intense internal conflict, where their will is 'maimed and half-divided' and struggles to act resolutely.

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  a maimed and half-divided will, struggling, with one part sinking as another rose.

• identifiesTwo Wills

  description

  The narrator concludes that internal conflict stems from the presence of two conflicting wills within their own soul, rather than two separate minds.

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  And therefore are there two wills, for that one of them is not entire

• servesGod

  description

  The narrator describes their long-held purpose and deliberation about serving the Lord their God.

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  Myself when I was deliberating upon serving the Lord my God now

• is aAdam

  description

  The narrator identifies their sin as a consequence of being a descendant of Adam, implying the concept of original sin.

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  in that I was a son of Adam.

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• makesConfession (Spiritual Practice)

  description

  The narrator engages in the act of confession, both in his heart before God and in his writing before witnesses.

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  This would I do in my heart before Thee in confession: and in my writing, before many witnesses

• is displeased withNarrator

  description

  The narrator expresses self-displeasure, which is a sign that God's presence shines out.

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  that I am displeased with myself

• lovesGod

  description

  The narrator affirms a deep and assured love for God, which was initiated by God's word.

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  do I love Thee, Lord. Thou hast stricken my heart with Thy word, and I loved Thee

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• came_fromGentiles

  description

  The narrator identifies himself as having come from among the Gentiles, highlighting his non-Jewish background.

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  And I had come to Thee from among the Gentiles;

• entered_intoinward self

  description

  The narrator describes an introspective journey into his inward self, guided by God.

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  entered even into my inward self

• beheldLight Unchangeable

  description

  The narrator experienced a profound spiritual vision, beholding the Light Unchangeable with the eye of his soul.

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  I entered and beheld with the eye of my soul (such as it was), above the same eye of my soul, above my mind, the Light Unchangeable.

• perceived_himself_inregion of unlikeness

  description

  The narrator perceived himself to be in a 'region of unlikeness,' signifying his spiritual distance from God.

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  I perceived myself to be far off from Thee, in the region of unlikeness

• heard_voice_ofGod

  description

  The narrator describes hearing God's voice from afar, including the divine self-declaration 'I AM that I AM'.

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• beheldCreation

  description

  The narrator observed all other things, understanding them to be below God in existence and nature.

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  And I beheld the other things below Thee

• held_opinion_ofTwo substances

  description

  The narrator's soul previously adopted the opinion of two substances, a belief that ultimately brought no spiritual rest.

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  it had gone into the opinion of two substances

• created_for_selftemple of its own idol

  description

  The narrator's soul, in its state of error, created a false god for itself, becoming a 'temple of its own idol'.

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  had again become the temple of its own idol

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• hungers_and_thirsts_afterTruth

  description

  The Narrator describes an intense spiritual longing and desire for Truth, which he equates with God.

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  But I hungered and thirsted not even after those first works of Thine, but after Thee Thyself, the Truth

• fed_onCorporeal Fantasies

  description

  The Narrator describes consuming these false concepts, believing them to be Truth, but finding them unsatisfying and exhausting.

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  Yet because I thought them to be Thee, I fed thereon

• believed_inFive Elements

  description

  The Narrator confesses to having believed in these false doctrines, which led him astray from Truth.

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  but those things I did believe

• encounteredMedea flying

  description

  The Narrator refers to 'Medea flying' as an example of poetic fables he heard or sang, but did not literally believe.

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• hatedStudy

  description

  During his boyhood, the narrator expressed a strong aversion to formal study and resented being compelled to engage in it.

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  I loved not study, and hated to be forced to it

• was forced toStudy

  description

  Despite his dislike, the narrator was compelled to engage in study by others, which ultimately served a good purpose.

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  Yet I was forced; and this was well done towards me, but I did not well; for, unless forced, I had not learnt

• hatedGreek Language

  description

  As a boy, the narrator intensely disliked the Greek language, possibly due to its foreignness and the harsh methods used to teach it.

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  But why did I so much hate the Greek

• lovedLatin Language

  description

  In contrast to Greek, the narrator found the Latin language enjoyable and readily embraced its study.

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  For the Latin I loved; not what my first masters

• was forced to learn aboutAeneas

  description

  The narrator was compelled to learn about the wanderings of Aeneas, a subject he found unengaging.

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  I was forced to learn the wanderings of one Aeneas

• wept forDido

  description

  The narrator shed tears for the mythological queen Dido, who killed herself for love, contrasting with his dry eyes for his own spiritual death.

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  to weep for dead Dido, because she killed herself for love

• committedFornication

  description

  The narrator metaphorically admits to committing spiritual fornication against God due to his worldly attachments and lack of love for the divine.

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  I committed fornication against Thee, and all around

• preferredPoetic Fictions

  description

  As a boy, the narrator favored the 'empty' poetic fictions, such as the stories of Aeneas and Dido, over more 'profitable' basic studies.

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  I preferred those empty to those more profitable studies

• hatedGreek Classics

  description

  The narrator's aversion extended to the Greek classics, despite their similar fictitious content, because of the difficulty of the language.

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  Why then did I hate the Greek classics

• was forced to learnHomer

  description

  The narrator was compelled to study the works of Homer, which he found bitter to his boyish taste due to the language barrier.

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• learnedLatin Language

  description

  The narrator acquired the Latin language without fear or suffering, through natural observation and encouragement.

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  this I learned without fear or suffering

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• delays_turning_toGod

  description

  The narrator acknowledges delaying his full commitment to God, deferring to live in Him day to day.

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  time passed on, but I delayed to turn to the Lord; and from day to day deferred to live in Thee, and deferred not daily to die in myself.

• opposesAlypius

  description

  The narrator counters Alypius's arguments against marriage by citing examples of married men who successfully cherished wisdom and served God.

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  But I opposed him with the examples of those who as married men had cherished wisdom, and served God acceptably, and retained their friends, and loved them faithfully.

• procuresConcubine (second)

  description

  Impatient for his intended marriage and still enslaved by lust, the narrator quickly obtained another concubine, though not a wife.

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  procured another, though no wife, that so by the servitude of an enduring custom, the disease of my soul might be kept up and carried on in its vigour, or even augmented, into the dominion of marriage.

• is_slave_toLust

  description

  The narrator describes himself as not so much a lover of marriage as a slave to lust, which drove his actions.

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  not being so much a lover of marriage as a slave to lust

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• sought_guidance_fromSimplicianus

  description

  The narrator felt divinely prompted to seek counsel and experience from Simplicianus, a devoted and wise servant of God.

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  And Thou didst put into my mind, and it seemed good in my eyes, to go to Simplicianus

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• knows less ofGod

  description

  The Narrator acknowledges his limited self-knowledge compared to his profound understanding of God.

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  For herein I know less of myself than of Thee.

• confesses untoBrethren

  description

  The Narrator desires to openly admit his faults to his brethren so they can intercede for him in prayer.

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  that I may confess unto my brethren, who are to pray for me

• enteredMemory (Narrator's)

  description

  The Narrator recounts his experience of exploring the deep and intricate parts of his own memory.

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  Thence entered I the recesses of my memory

• surveys the world withOutward Senses

  description

  The Narrator explains his method of perceiving the world through his physical senses.

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  With my outward senses, as I might, I surveyed the world, and observed the life, which my body hath from me, and these my senses

• consideredThreefold Concupiscence

  description

  The Narrator reflects deeply on the nature and manifestations of the 'threefold concupiscence' as the source of his sins.

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  Thus then have I considered the sicknesses of my sins in that threefold concupiscence

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• revolved_thoughts_onEvil

  description

  The narrator deeply pondered the problem of evil in his heart, indicating a personal struggle with the concept.

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• has_faith_inChrist

  description

  Despite his intellectual struggles, the narrator maintained a fixed faith in Christ.

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  yet was the faith of Thy Christ, our Lord and Saviour, professed in the Church Catholic, firmly fixed in my heart

• rejectedAstrology

  description

  The narrator states that he had by this time discarded the practices of astrology.

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  By this time also had I rejected the lying divinations and impious dotages of the astrologers

• inclined_towardsNebridius

  description

  The narrator began to lean towards Nebridius's opinion regarding the falsity of astrology.

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  I, who had herein now begun to incline towards Nebridius' opinion

• was_freed_fromNarrator's Fetters

  description

  The narrator states that he was loosed from the intellectual and spiritual constraints that previously held him.

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  hadst Thou loosed me from those fetters

• continued_to_seekEvil

  description

  Even after being freed from some intellectual binds, the narrator continued to search for the origin of evil.

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  and I sought "whence is evil," and found no way

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  2026-03-02T21:55:50.230Z

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• praisesGod

  description

  The narrator expresses his admiration for God as the ultimate Creator and Orderer of all things.

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  I go on from them to praise Thee the wonderful Creator and Orderer of all

• hopes_inDivine Mercy

  description

  The narrator places his sole hope in the great mercy of God to overcome the struggles and imperfections of his life.

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  my one hope is Thy wonderful great mercy

• bearsDivine Yoke

  description

  The narrator now carries God's will and law, finding it light and manageable.

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  And now I bear it and it is light

• struggles_withSecret Sins

  description

  The narrator expresses fear and difficulty in discerning his hidden moral faults.

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  I much fear my secret sins

• is_delighted_withPraise

  description

  The narrator confesses his personal enjoyment of receiving commendation.

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  I am delighted with praise

• is_delighted_with_more_thanDivine Truth

  description

  The narrator claims to find greater delight in the fundamental truth of God than in receiving human commendation.

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  but with truth itself, more than with praise

• ought_to_be_moved_by_praises_forNeighbor

  description

  The narrator realizes that any motivation derived from his own praises should be for the benefit of his fellow human beings, not for selfish reasons.

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  I see that I ought not to be moved at my own praises, for my own sake, but for the good of my neighbour

• prays_to_discoverNarrator

  description

  The narrator implores God to reveal his true inner state and hidden faults to himself, so he can confess them to others for prayer.

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  I beseech now, O my God, discover to me myself also

• prays_to_be_spared_fromSinner's Oil

  description

  The narrator asks God to protect him from self-deception or harmful flattery that could lead to spiritual complacency or corruption.

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  This madness put far from me, O Lord, lest mine own mouth be to me the sinner's oil to make fat my head

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